That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
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