apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
