it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Randomize
