I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
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