My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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