I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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