know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
