the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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