Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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