smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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