thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Randomize
