Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
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