So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
