i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
