Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
