ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
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