hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
