Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize