We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
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Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
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Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
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