Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
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