my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Randomize