And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
