Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
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The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
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He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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