i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
