well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
