ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
