even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize