i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
