Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
