garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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