i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I am full of burrito and curiosity
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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