i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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