ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Randomize
