The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Randomize
