I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
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