You really coming over, don't trick.
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize
