And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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