Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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