I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
this will be a night to untag.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I party with great urgency now.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
