i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Randomize
