We're facebook friends in real life
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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