all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Randomize
