What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
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you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
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She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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