This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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