I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
