When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
