i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
