No, you can still breathe under the balls.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
foreskin is a definite game changer
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize
