I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
it glows. i had to have it.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Randomize
