I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
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