Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize